I started writing a post about slowing down yesterday. Today I deleted half of it and wrote another paragraph. Now I have completely forgotten what else I was going to say. So it sits unfinished. I promise to make it riveting when inspiration returns. This is surely a symptom of an overburdened mind. I'm guessing so is the fact that I keep walking into rooms and opening closets then completely forgetting what I was looking for or planning to do. Or the fact that I was sure I shaved my legs but obviously did not. I'm starting to resemble a yeti. And not the cute one from the old Rudolph movie.
Mario and I received bummer news about our house yesterday. Things were discouraging, but still up in the air. A shred of optimism remained, if you will. Now we have resolution. It is not what we wanted to hear, by any stretch of the imagination, but we are trying to look at the bright side and keep our chins up. Our plans to move next summer haven't changed; we are simply reeling a bit. A little vague, I know, but that's all I want to say about that. At this juncture, anyway. More emotional processing must be done. Years from now this hurdle will merely be another blip on our radar. At least we know what we are facing and can therefore prepare ourselves. Knowledge is power, right?
Instead of dwelling, and in order to give myself a happy distraction, I've decided to post some photos from our trip to Portland. Boy can we see ourselves there. Our lovely friend, Troy, was the best darn tour guide there ever was. And because he knows us well, lunch on the food truck block was our first stop.
After lunch we walked our way through downtown. I even spent a good chunk of change on a pair of Keen shoes whose cuteness was hotly debated among my Facebook and Instagram friends. I maintain that they are the bee's knees. If those shoes aren't proof I belong in the Pacific Northwest, I don't know what is.
It was the best kind of day. I can't wait to make this area our home.
I do want to say one more thing: grief is necessary. Although we didn't suffer the loss of a loved one, we did suffer a loss of sorts. At first I rationalized. Then I got mad and wanted to make our old realtor pay for his, well, sucky-ness. Today, I'm sad. It's not pleasant to feel wretched, but I've learned so much about myself, Mario, and my true desires. Good, insightful things. I am learning valuable lessons for the future. I've always been one to persevere in the face of adversity, but evidence of this skill is essential to maintaining it. My boys are happy. We are together and healthy. We are not ruined. We are merely transitioning to the next stage of our lives in an expected way. Unpleasant? A bit. But boy will achieving our end goal be gratifying. Because we fought for it.